Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Randomize
