I wannas sexs uuuuu
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize
