So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
