Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
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