I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize
