dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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