Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
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