it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Randomize
