I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
My life is pants optional.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
