he shaved USA in his pubs
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
