WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
