But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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