you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize