grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
