Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
So much rum. So many feels.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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