as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
