you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
