How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
