Walk of Shame. In a state park.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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