I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Randomize
