with your own penis?
one might say we're banned from that church
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Randomize
