Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
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