worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
It's rum buckets o'clock
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