I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
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