I like to think it a success when the cops are called
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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