We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
