there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
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