And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Randomize
