sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
