I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
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