i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
