Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
