i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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