Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
