so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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