I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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