god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Randomize
