It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
Randomize