I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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