i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
Come on in and take your pants off
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