After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
