I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
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