super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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