You just made me feel so damn special
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
