Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
