So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
sex in a hospital.. check
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
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