fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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