All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
