I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
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