I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
