Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
